The H-Bomb: Dear readers, as I’m sure you already know, my favorite holiday, Halloween, is almost upon us. So, in celebration of this joyous festival of Samhain (pronounced SAH-win, you simpleton), I thought it the perfect time to share with you some seasonal favorites of mine. However, instead of recommending the obvious, like Halloween, or The Shining, or Trick ‘r Treat (all of which you should be watching anyway), I decided to shine a light on some less conventional flicks that maybe you haven’t seen, or even heard of. Also, there are some, like Frailty, Night of the Creeps, and Ginger Snaps, that I would have put on the list, but since I’ve already reviewed them, I won’t. Anyway, without any further delay, here are my ten picks for Halloween:
Altered– If there was ever a sequel to Fire in the Sky, in which the rednecks took revenge on their alien abductors, this would be it. Eduardo Sanchez, co-director of The Blair Witch Project, crafts a claustrophobic chamber piece that unfolds mostly in one location. If done poorly, this could’ve turned into an un-watchable bore. However, Sanchez steadily ratchets up the tension by having the terrified human characters become more and more unhinged with each passing second, and by making the extraterrestrial an extremely unpleasant sort who loves to play tug of war with people’s intestines. The ending is pretty weak, I must admit, but everything up to that point, is edge-of-your-ass excitement.
Carnival of Souls– Before Jacob’s Ladder, before The Sixth Sense, there was this eerie little chiller about a young woman who survives a drag racing accident, and soon finds herself being stalked by a phantom creeper from an old carnival. While certainly slow paced by today’s standards, this 1962 spook-fest boasts a sublimely surreal tone, and delivers a twist at the end that was quite novel back in the day. All in all, pretty impressive for a picture made on a budget of about nine bucks.
The Dark Half– Did you know that every once in a great while, George A. Romero makes a movie that has nothing to do with zombies? Well, his 1993 adaptation of the Stephen King novel, about an author whose pseudonym comes to murderous life, is perhaps his most under-seen and criminally under-appreciated film. A rare case of a horror movie with a brain, the studio that financed it (Orion) went out of business while it was being made, hence it was undeservedly dumped into theaters with no fanfare whatsoever, and to this day, many King and Romero fans aren’t even aware of its existence. A damn shame, as the film is mysterious, suspenseful, and features a terrific dual performance by Oscar-winner Timothy Hutton.
Intruder– From that same pack of Michigan filmmakers who gave us The Evil Dead flicks, comes this grisly little bit of carnage candy in which the employees working the night shift at a grocery store get picked off, one at a time, by a crazed killer. Stylishly directed by Scott Spiegel, this way over-the-top slasher never takes itself too seriously, and features some of the most inventively gory deaths you’ll ever see. Evil Dead director Sam Raimi suffers a particularly gruesome demise. Be warned, however, the DVD cover lists Bruce Campbell as one of the stars… that is a bald-faced lie. He shows up, at the very end, for about thirty seconds. Talk about false fucking advertising… the movie’s awesome, anyway.
Lost Highway– While not strictly a horror movie, per se, this psychological film noir is about as dark and twisted as any fright flick out there. It starts out with an unhappily married couple, Bill Pullman and Patricia Arquette, watching a mysterious videotape left on their doorstep, and it all goes bat-shit from there, as this is easily one of the greatest mind-fucks ever put on film. Stands to reason, it was directed by everyone’s favorite mind-fuck artist, David Lynch, who utilizes the shadowy cinematography, and his trademark sound design, to create an unnerving sense of dread and foreboding. We’re made to feel afraid, even when we have no idea what we’re supposed to be afraid of. A densely layered work that demands multiple viewings, you shouldn’t be too hard on yourself if you don’t get it the first time you see it, as most people don’t.
Phantasm– Years before Don Coscarelli pitted Elvis Presley against a mummy in a Texas nursing home, he made this low budget shocker about two brothers who discover that there is something very strange going down at their local cemetery, and something very wrong about that creepy tall fucker who runs the place. Shot on a shoestring budget over the course of a year, this one-of-a-kind sci-fi/horror is proof that you don’t need the big bucks to make a film as ambitious and wildly imaginative as this one. Yeah, some of the effects are hokey (others work surprisingly well), and the performances are uneven, but it’s all part of the film’s charm. Yeah, a bloody horror flick with charm… go figure. This did spawn a franchise, but honestly this one is the only one that’s worth a damn, as it has an insane, nightmarish vibe that none of the sequels were ever able to recapture. When all is said and done, this is one wicked little flick with a mean set of balls… flying balls… just watch the fuckin’ movie.
Prince of Darkness– Even though I wasn’t going to go for the obvious Halloween, there was no way in hell I was going to leave John Carpenter off of this list, as no one does slow burning horror quite like him. This, along with The Thing and In the Mouth of Madness, is part of what he has dubbed his “Apocalypse Trilogy.” It involves a priest (an effectively subdued Donald Pleasence), a physics professor, and several of his best students, going into a humongous old church in order to confront an ancient evil that is about to be unleashed upon the world. Here, Carpenter uses the age old science vs. religion debate to tell a genuinely unique Satanic story, one that is chock-full of disgusting insects, nasty impalings, and an army of evil hobos led by Alice Cooper. What could be scarier than that?
Session 9– Locations don’t get much scarier than old, abandoned mental hospitals. That’s what director Brad Anderson (The Machinist, The Call) thought when he dreamed up this scenario of a hazmat crew tasked with cleaning up the Danvers Mental Institution. As the work days wear on, the tensions rise among the various crew members, as one of them harbors a dark secret, and another has discovered some disturbing interview tapes with one of the asylum’s more unbalanced patients. Anderson has seen The Shining a few times in his life, and it shows, as this is one that seeps under our skin gradually to freak us the fuck out. That it is set mostly during the daytime, yet still manages to be pretty fucking terrifying, is a testament to how effective it is.
Vampyr– A 1932 talkie with so little dialogue it might as well be silent, Carl Theodor Dreyer’s macabre classic deserves to be held up alongside Nosferatu and The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari as one of the best of its kind. Very loosely adapted from Sheridan Le Fanu’s “Carmilla,” the plot itself is abstract and unfolds like a fever dream. The imagery is striking and the overall mood is quite haunting. This one is primarily for film students and cinephiles, as your Average Joe moviegoer will probably lose patience with it, and deem it dull, very quickly. A genuine work of art, and a masterpiece of horror cinema.
The Woods– In 2006, Lucky McKee followed up his breakthrough indie horror hit, May, with this supernatural tale of a troublesome teenage girl who is sent to a secluded boarding school in the middle of a forest, and eventually finds out that there is something off about the faculty and staff running the place. Like with The Dark Half, the studio funding the project went under, and the movie essentially got crapped out onto DVD shelves, and it really deserved so much better. It’s a spooky little flick that definitely borrows a bit from Suspiria, but is very much it’s own thing. Patricia Clarkson steals the show as the school’s malevolent head mistress, and Bruce Campbell turns up in a meaty supporting role to show everyone that he is, indeed, still the King.
Anyway, those are my ten, tell me yours in the comments below, and please remember: drink responsibly, check your candy for razor blades, don’t go trick or treating at the neighborhood sex offender’s house, and have a Happy Halloween!
